Conquer The Past
Reclaim Your Life
Are You Ready To Make Rest of
Your Life The Best of Your Life?
Did you grow up in a dysfunctional family?
Did you have a difficult childhood that is affecting your life today?
Have you tried therapy but it has not helped?
For more than 25 years I have coached my clients to better health. Almost all of them had a difficult childhood that was affecting their health, relationships, career, and life in general.
They were plagued with negative thought patterns, worries, and anxiety. They catastrophized every incident, no matter how minor, expecting the worst possible outcome and as a result, created a massive amount of tension in their mind and body every single day. All this tension led to various physical manifestations ranging from back and neck pain to numbness in arm and legs, as well as digestive issues, allergies, cardiovascular issues, and more.
They felt like a victim of their circumstance--constantly asking themselves and others, “Why does this always happen to me?” or “If that had not happened, this wouldn’t have happened?” actually more like, “If I didn’t have a bad childhood, I wouldn’t be in this mess?”
They try very hard not to make a mistake. In their effort to be perfect as a student, an employee, a spouse, a parent, and so on they are extremely hard on themselves when they make a mistake. They can be so self-critical that they can generate a massive amount of self-directed anger.
Certainly, we can try to understand how these mental and physical patterns developed. For example, being a perfectionist could develop when children believe that if they are perfect and make no mistakes, adults in their lives would not yell so much and be caring and loving. As they grow up with this belief and carry that into adulthood, the pressure they put on themselves to be perfect and not to make a mistake can be overwhelming. Next time you see someone dealing with vertigo, it could be that they are overwhelmed!
Understanding how our mental and emotional habits or personality traits have developed can be helpful, however, it does not always lead to mitigation and/or the resolution of the destructive mental and emotional habits that developed early in life. These destructive mental and emotional habits do not serve the person as an adult and can wreak havoc with their relationships at home and outside the home.
If you have read Rapid Recovery from Back and Neck Pain: A Nine-Step Recovery Plan, you know that I had a very challenging childhood. As I wrote in chapter Five of my book, my college psychology class helped me understand how changes in my perspective through self-talk and visualization could transform my life. And it certainly did. I realized that I did not need to be a victim of my circumstances, neither should you.
How do I help my clients conquer the past?
First, I help them develop the mental skills that break the destructive mental and emotional habits and replace them with positive empowering ones.
Then I recommend they read Dr. Laura Schlesinger’s Bad Childhood-Good Life: How to Blossom and Thrive in Spite of an Unhappy Childhood.
This book has been truly transformative for me and my clients. Here are some of the important takeaways from what Dr. Schlesinger’s:
1. Do not live in the past
2. Do not repeat the past
3. Do not relive the past
What do these mean?
1. Do not live in the past: there are many people who are accomplished, have a great career, a loving spouse and healthy children, and living a life that others can only dream of, yet, they are not enjoying their great life because they are mentally living in the past. They are still angry over what happened in their childhood. When playing with their children they are there physically but not mentally. They are living in the past. They are eating a delicious meal, but do not enjoy it because while eating they are dwelling on the sad past. One of the strategies I teach helps my clients to stop living in the past and enjoy living in the present.
2. Do not repeat the past: do not hit if you were hit. Do not call your children names if you were called names. It is not easy but can be done with awareness and mental training. All of which are part of this course.
3. Do not relive the past: there are those who unconsciously form relationships that help them relive their childhood or make up for it. Dr. Schlesinger gives the example of a woman who married a divorced man who had cheated on his wife. Why did she trust him? As a child, she was ignored and abandoned. By marrying a man who had cheated on his wife she is unconsciously setting herself up to relive the past. If he cheats on her, she will feel hurt and abandoned. If he does not, she will feel special. In either case, instead of choosing a spouse based on what would lead to a happy fulfilling marriage, she ended up choosing a spouse based on her unhappy childhood.
What has been the result?
One of my clients had stopped talking to his mother for thirty years. She had filed for divorce when he was a teenager. Going through my program helped him change his perspective, overcome his resentment of her, and after thirty years visit her with a gift
Another client, a Hollywood actor, realized he was treating directors of movies he was starring in as if they were his father with whom he had many issues. He would get into conflicts with directors just as he did with his father. Becoming aware of that combined with other empowering mental skills, helped him stop this destructive pattern.
A mother who was constantly blaming herself for not being a perfect mother recovered through my program and began to focus on the joy of loving and raising her beautiful children.
So are you ready to leave it behind?
So, if you are ready to leave your unhappy childhood where it belongs and start a fulfilling life, then come along on this journey with me.
What’s the first step?
You begin with reading Bad Childhood-Good Life: How to Blossom and Thrive in Spite of an Unhappy Childhood. If reading it resolves your issues, you are done!
If you need additional support, you can register for Conquer The Past and Reclaim Your Life!
The first module in this online course will help you stop living in the past and enjoy your present life. It is the antidote to worry, anxiety, sadness, and depression. It helps you turn stressful situations, problems, and daily annoyances into sources of energy and excitement in three easy steps. The more you practice this strategy the better your results. It’s about a simple shift in your mind and body. It will produce within you a positive focus to help you move forward and leave your unhappy childhood behind.
The next module will help you take 100% responsibility for your happiness. It helps to stop blaming your unhappy childhood (yes, I know. If I knew what your childhood was like, I would be blaming your parents too.) The reality is that every time you get in the blame game it diminishes your life without changing the past. Think about this: if your parents apologize to your profusely, cried, and begged you to forgive them, which is unlikely to happen in most cases, will that really make up for what happened. It is better to learn new ways of dealing with old issues and grow as a person. This module will help you do that.
At this point, if a client is still having difficulty with thoughts of their bad childhood, I teach them the simple strategy contained in module three. This strategy helps you stop them and keep the floodgate of negative thoughts shut. It is simple, yet, extremely effective. In the words of my Hollywood client, it did what years of psychoanalysis, cognitive therapy, and other therapies did not.
There you have it: three easy and highly effective strategies to help you stop living the past and reliving it. As you progress in this direction and your level of anger and anxiety diminishes and your awareness increases, you will notice that you have also stopped repeating the past!
Does it seem to easy? It can be. Sometimes the problem is devastating but the solution is simple. Infections after childbirth used to be fatal for most women. Once it was discovered that the simple act of washing hands prevents it many lives were saved. Simple but effective.
About this course
When you register for this course, you will receive three online modules. Each module contains an audio, along with questions or instructions or both.
You can view the module Turn Problems into Energy and Excitement in Three Easy Steps. In this module Fred will show you how to do exactly that. You will be much happier, much healthier, and more resilient. This can help you stay pain-free and active, as well as conquer anxiety, depression, and pessimism.
You can view the module The Three Sources of Massive Tension and Pain. This module explains the three mental patterns that create a massive amount of tension and pain. Unless you identify and deal with these constructively, you will always be tense and in pain.
You can view the module Stop Negative Thoughts in One Easy Step. Are you plagued with negative thoughts? Have you noticed how one negative thought leads to another and another to create tension and pain? How would you like to close the floodgate of negative thoughts so that you can be happier and healthier? In this module, Fred Amir will show you how to stop these negative thoughts in one simple step.
Guarantee: This iCourses come with a 100 percent satisfaction guarantee for 12 months from the date you register.
This iCourse is only $99.99
(For a limited time $19.99)